Sensitive information, but help needed

Hello all. I have not been working much the past 12 days due to the below post, this has taken precedence over just about everything else in my life. I hope to return to work in the next few days, until then my husband has taken over everything. Please read the following and consider helping out if you can. Thank you.

Hello All,
It is with a very heavy heart I am sending out this email. The following information may be upsetting to some people as it involves the death of a teenager.


A friend of mine who used to attend The Crossings Church with me is going though a very tragic experience. Her 16yo son has struggled with depression and other mental health issues for years. On Tuesday September 23rd he attempted to take his own life.


That night he had watched a movie with his Mom and a friend of ours, told them both he loved them then went to bed. She was woken up around 2 AM by a knock on the door, it was the police with Tim. He had been found at a party and was intoxicated. Tim was also taking Seroquel which should never be taken when one is drinking alcohol as it impairs the ability to have rational thought.

His Mother sent him to bed and went to check on him a short while later and found him unconscious and without a pulse. He was able to be revived and is currently at Cardinal Glennon Children's Hospital.


Unfortunately his brain was very damaged and he will not be able to pull though this. He was taken off life support on Monday 9/29 at 5:30pm. As of now, 10/2/08, he is still breathing on his own because his body is very strong but he is non responsive and is in an altered state of consciousness, we expect him to go soon.


(edited to add, Tim passed away 10/4/08 about 8:30pm. We desperately need help with his funeral costs now.)

Tim was an awesome kid. He had friends from all sorts of cliques at school rather than just being friends with one group of kids. So many kids have come to the hospital and said how much Tim would help them when they were sad, how he would carry their books, help them to the counselor, give them a shoulder to cry on and more. Tim however, took on all of their pain and had no healthy way of letting go of their hurts, so he was carrying their burdens along with his own. He loved people so much he just couldn't turn away from their hurts and took them to his heart.

When Timmy was 8 his father took his own life, the loss of his father has always haunted him. All of this along with his mental health issues just made it to much for one child to deal with rationally.


The reason I am emailing this to you is that his Mom has no life insurance on him. She is very recently single and has no source of income. While that is difficult on its own, this has made finding a job, taking care of 4 small children and keeping her head above water is almost impossible. Her other children are 11, twins age 4, and a 3yo- she will need to be able to take time help them cope with the loss of a big brother they all adored. She also feels she can not go back to the house she was living in, its just to hard on her to be there, so she will also be having to find a place to live.

We are trying to do all that we can to raise funds to cover funeral costs and to help her be able to get back on her feet, yet have time to grieve her son and help her other children.


If you can help please go to any US Bank and ask to donate to the Tim Barnfield Donation Account. Every small amount helps. Please also send this along to your friends and family so we can all band together to help this family deal with this tragic loss.

Please also, if you know of anyone struggling or considering suicide please get them help right away. If you are struggling with suicide please call 1-800-Suicide (784-2433). Life can get better with help.


Thank you for reading,
Nichole Ave-Lallemant